Monday, April 27, 2009

Mental Health

I have been having a hard time lately.... most of you know all about it, but for those who don't I will summarize.

I went for a long time with no seizures, and had gotten my hopes up that they were finally gone for good. I had been planning to move on with life in general and get a job and all that jazz... I was really excited! Then, Monday, April 13, 2009 I had three seizures back to back. I was devastated... and became depressed and suicidal.

The last two weeks have been really hard. I have had seizures nearly every day, and nightmares every time I managed to fall asleep. I couldn't sleep most nights and if it weren't for my husband, Church, friends, and family, I probably would have succeeded in committing suicide. I was convinced that I was not strong enough to handle this relapse.

Thanks to my awesome support group, I am still here.... and I can finally say that I am doing better. I have slept well since last Friday with no nightmares, I am getting mental health treatment, my doctor put me on Prozac, and I am making time to go to the Temple this coming Friday.

I am taking every day as it comes and not pressuring myself to "run faster than I am able". My house is a disaster, I had cupcakes for dinner last night, and I am lucky if I shower every day.... but I am taking care of me and my son and my husband in the ways that matter most.... and working on strengthening our family and getting me better.

Thanks for all the prayers and well wishes that have been coming our way... please keep them coming... I may be able to see the stars now, but it is a long way till dawn!

Sunday, April 12, 2009


We really had a great Easter week this year. We avoided the commercialized aspects of what Easter has become in America... what with bunnies that lay eggs and massive marketing of candy and Easter baskets and toys.... We focused on Christ and what he went through. It really was an uplifting week! This video is really fantastic!

I did get a few comments on how we were really taking the fun out of holidays, since we don't celebrate Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, The Tooth Fairy, et al.... but Shawn and I believe that it is wrong to tell our children that these things are true and then have them find out later that we were lying to them, how can they trust that we are telling the truth about Christ!?